happy-rain-cloud

When it rains…

…everything gets wet.

Wait, that’s not right.

“When it rains, it pours.”

That’s the one.

Taken literally, it might seem like a bad thing. All that wet means you can’t go outside and enjoy the good weather.

But what if you’re suffering a drought? Then all that rain can be a major blessing.

I’ve been in a drought for a long time. I’ve survived through a few mild wet seasons, but it was just getting by. Then I hit my hardest drought ever last December. It was the worst because I had thought things were looking up. Then my anxiety and depression kicked me in the sack. I lost my job. I was 40 years old living with my wife and kids at my in-law’s house.

That, my friends, is a shitty feeling.

I don’t know exactly why, but I decided that it would be a good time to finally try my hand at writing full time.

I developed a plan.

I had a timeline of events in place and after discussing it with my wife, decided that my plan was realistic.

We knew that my success would be a long time coming. We were prepared for it.

I began my work.

Now, three and a half months later, I can see that things are not going according to plan.

I’m about one year AHEAD of the plan.

NO SHIT!

I’m writing a serialized book that I’m publishing the first draft of on I Can’t Brain called The Linden Tree.

I’m working closely with an old friend on a more serious epic fantasy book(s). This friend has been working as a freelance writer for over 15 years and knows his stuff. His input is going to be invaluable. He’s also not afraid to give me a kick in the ass if I start slacking.

I’m Co-Community Leader of Studio 30 Plus, a social site for writers of all types.

And, just today, I received some great news about another business venture. I pretty sure that I can’t talk about it just yet (let’s say I signed a NDA), but it’s going to be tons of fun, frustration and a huge learning experience. I’m actually happy about it!

So yeah, the plan is going strong.

Outside of the plan, things are cool too.

I got a tax return and bought all kinds of fun stuff for the wife and kids (and me!), all after paying the bills. I’ll be participating in a Guild Wars 2 beta event this weekend and The Avengers is coming out in a few weeks.

It’s just been a great time!

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Lillies and Remains

The light drizzle was a soft counterpart to the violence that welled inside me. As I watched the box being lowered into the hole, one white lily slid off the side into the mud, tarnished and now imperfect.

Like her.

All that remains of her is a hollow inside of me, being filled with rage.

She did this to herself.

I hate her for it.

My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog
This is for Leeroy and Lance. Trying my hand at the 100 word song yet again.
Kids_Fighting

Border Patrol

Throughout history, wars have been fought for a number of reasons: revenge, greed, women and border disputes.

At a young age, I got some early training in the art of war which proved invaluable for my hobby of wargaming that I picked up in my adult years.

I learned about border disputes and how to resolve them.

Sort of.

My young grade school days were spent during the 70′s. An idyllic time of energy crisis, sexual revolution and rampant drug use. The house my parents owned was an unassuming ranch located midway on a short dead-end street of nine houses – six on one side, three on the other.

We had our share of “big kids” and “little kids” but most of us were the same age, going to the same school and in many cases, being in the same class.

We kids saw each other all the time. It was a time when our mothers would kick us out the door right after breakfast if the weather was even remotely nice (not raining) and told not to come back until lunch, at which point we’d be kicked out again and told to “be back for dinner” or “be back when the street lights come on.”

It was a time of independence that kids these days don’t experience. A time when if we were needed at home, our mothers would stick their head out a window and shout our name. A time when we could ride our bikes en masse to the local farmer’s market and buy penny candy. Yes, penny candy.

It was also a time of unchecked bullying and fighting. It was a time before “political correctness” when words were used as weapons with no regard for what they actually meant. It was a time of “I’ll show you mine, if you show me yours.” It was also a time of:

“Get out of my yard!”

For most of my childhood, I had a crush on one of the twins who lived next door. One of the twins? you ask. Yeah, they were fraternal. I never said anything to her – or anybody – until now. Yeah, big secret, I know.

Most of the time, we got along.

But every once in a while, something would happen. Some childhood disagreement would escalate to shouting, shoving, punches thrown and hair pulled.

And then the ultimate punishment: Banishment from each other’s yard.

There was no fence to mark the line. Just a small pipe shoved into the ground at the rear of the property, half buried in leaves and detritus.

We would stand in our respective kingdoms, shouting insults and taunting the other to cross. We ran along the unseen line, looking for a way to cross, constantly being blocked by our rival. Occasionally, one of us would get a foot across that unobtrusive border and then:

“Nyah! Nyah! Look at me! I’m in your yard!”

The shouting and shoving began anew.

Sometimes, out siblings would jump in and help defend us.

That never turned out well.

I can’t recall either of our parents getting involved. Now that I’m an adult and my ears are acutely tuned to the voices of my children, I know our parents heard us. But like I said, it was a different time when kids were left alone to resolve differences and figure it out on our own.

Eventually, one or the other of us would just give up and leave – find something else to do.

And, either later that day or the next, hide and seek or kick ball would ensue, the whole altercation forgotten.

Only to happen again a week later.

Fun times.

**Blogger’s Note** I searched desperately for pictures to go with this post but I don’t have any that would have worked. So, if any of you from the old Traver Lane read my blog (I don’t think any of you do) some pictures of the neighborhood or of the old gang would be most useful.

Weekly Recap Graphic

Gone, but still working

Hey all, just a quick update as to what’s been happening.

I Can’t Brain has taken a back seat to other projects over the past week, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been writing.

Bastone was written in response to the Studio30 Plus writing prompt of “It wasn’t what I was expecting.” You can check out all the other responses in this forum post.

I’ve also written a couple of “writer’s helper” articles for S30P. Where Has the Time Gone? talks about ways to find time to write in your busy day and The Art of Wordsmithing discusses the importance of word choice when looking over your work with a critical eye.

I submitted a memoir piece to the Write on Edge literary review, Precipice. If my piece is chosen, it will appear in the book. Yes, published. My fingers are crossed.

In gaming news, I spent some fun time with my boys this past week playing a new game I bought, The Settlers of Catan. I also pre-ordered the highly anticipated Guild Wars 2.

Not even having fun can stop them from fighting...

settlersbox

I actually had a ton of fun with my kids last night.

Yesterday afternoon I finally bought a game that I had been wanting for years.

The Settlers of Catan by Klaus Teuber.

I know most of you other hard-core tabletop gamers have this and have played it to death for years, but it’s brand new to me. I never bought it because I knew I wouldn’t have anyone to play with so I couldn’t justify the expense – until a few weeks ago. My oldest boy asked if I had ever heard of the game and what I thought about it. I didn’t answer him right away because my vision blurred and all I could think of was holding that amazing box in hands.

I could buy it now!

Guilt free!

We didn’t have the 2-3 hours needed to play a full game last night, but we did set it up and played for about an hour.

Okay, more like and hour and a half.

Fine!

Two hours!

The two older boys and I set the game up, I explained the basics and away we went.

A simple design, yet so fun!

The object of the game is to expand your settlements around the board. Each settlement earns you one victory point. If you upgrade your settlements to cities, you get two victory points.

Each turn, you roll two die. The resulting number tells which hexes produce resources.

The resource cards. You need these to build stuff.

If you have a settlement on the corner of a hex that produced resources, you get a resource card – two cards if it’s a city.

The cards are then used to build roads, build settlements, upgrade settlements to cities or buy development cards. Development cards do some cool things. They can give you victory points, help you progress in some way (ie: give you two free roads) or allow you to play a Knight.

Playing a Knight card activates the Robber. The Robber can either be your best friend (if you’re the one activating him) or the biggest pain in the ass ever. When activated, the Robber is placed on a hex of the activator’s choice. That hex no longer produces resources (until the Robber is moved away) and the activator gets to steal one resource card from a player who has a settlement or city on the Robber’s hex.

Close-up of a city.

After one turn, the boys observed that the game is “like a cross between Monopoly and Risk.”

After two turns, we lost track of time.

After three turns, we were laughing and having so much, I was considering letting them stay up late so we could finish.

After four turns, the wife came downstairs and asked with a smile on her face, “What happened to only playing a few turns?”

Oops, time to pack it up, boys.

Well, as we were packing up, both of them asked if we could play again today.

And over the weekend.

You bet, guys.

Just be prepared for an ass-whoopin’!

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Total Nerdgasm.

As of today, Guild Wars 2 is available for pre-purchase. This can mean only one thing:

IT’LL BE OUT SOON!!!

Check out the webpage ArenaNet has set up for the pre-purchase event. They are offering three different packages: A Digital Edition ($59.99), A Deluxe Digital Edition ($79.99) and A Collector’s Edition ($149.99). I don’t go for the Collector’s Editions of any game so I’ll probably be pre-purchasing the Deluxe Digital. The deluxe package comes with the game, and a number of in-game extras that are design to make game-play either more fun, or a bit easier for a short time.

The original Guild Wars game came out six years ago and I started playing it a month or two just after it’s release. I played it almost everyday for 3 years and now I check in every once in a while. It’s one of those games that’s not like any other and from what I have seen and heard about GW2, the MMO genre is about to be turned on it’s head.

Once I have the game and played it for a bit (alas, I haven’t been invited to any of the closed beta tests yet) I’ll be writing all about it. Unless, I AM invited to a CBT, then I can’t write about because I’ll have to sign a NDA ….

I’m giddy with excitement!

UPDATE

I just pre-purchased the Deluxe Digital Edition. I was given the option to link my existing Guild Wars account to the new Guild Wars 2 account. This will now give me bonus rewards for having met certain criteria in the original game. Very cool!

Also, pre-purchasing gives you guaranteed access to Beta Events and a 3-day head start before the official release. Awesomesauce!

dave-matthews

DMB

The WYSIWYG editor beckons.

Mind is blank.

Dave Matthews is on shuffle – all 13 albums. Never listen to them all.

Music Monday and music has been scarce lately.

The website took a lot of time.

Took it back this weekend with help from Katniss.

Dave wonders if “I’ll ever hold you again.” The audience roars.

Sometimes, it might be nice to be under the table and dreaming.

Dreaming of everything missing.

I am who I am.

Who am I?

It’s a typical situation in these typical times – no rhyme and reason to it.

Everybody’s happy, everybody’s free.

I’m a fool to think so.

Lennon said, “All you need is love.” Dave is saying it too.

Same words, different meanings.

It takes me up and away.

40-tb

A Strange Occurance in Bedford

I must relate some recent events.

In the summer of 2006, I was visiting my in-laws – I had come over to lend a hand with the removal of wallpaper from their living room – and during lunch, I took the opportunity to browse my father-in-law’s modest, yet very interesting, library. His books are arranged by subject, and having an interest in history, I perused those books first.

Amongst books about the American Civil War, World War II, Army Training Manuals and colonial life in New England, I found a thick volume bearing the title, “History of Bedford, NH, 1737-1971.” My father-in-law lived in Bedford (had since the early 1960′s, though he was raised in Manchester, just to the east). At the time, I resided in Hooksett, north of Manchester, though the events I am about to relate caused my relocation in the following years.

I asked if I could borrow the book about Bedford, along with the other volumes relating colonial life (all of which were written in the 1950′s for school children), with the hope that I would learn something of early New England life. The response was, “Yes.”

The school books taught me nothing new and two pages into the History, I knew that I would be disappointed. The book, published in 1971, relied heavily on an earlier history of Bedford, published in 1903, for its beginning chapters. The bulk of the 782 page 1971 history dealt with the 20th century. The 1903 history (which the 1971 book lists at 1,128 pages!) was reduced to about 100 pages in the newer history. Gone were the first-hand accounts of people who remembered the Bedford of the mid-19th century. Gone were the reams of Town Meeting minutes. Gone were the most extensive genealogical tables of any town in New Hampshire. Gone was the detailed information I sought!

Angered, I became determined to find a copy of the 1903 history.

It proved to be an impossible task in the following years.

The Bedford library no longer had any copies available to the public. Their one remaining copy was in such a state of decomposition that no one but professional historians were allowed to view it, and then only sparingly. None of the libraries in the surrounding towns (Manchester, Merrimack, Amherst and Goffstown) had copies. Book retailers (both new and used) as well as internet searches turned up nothing.

I soon gave up my search, read the 1971 history, and then forgot the whole ordeal.

In the fall of 2008, I took the family for a drive up Mount Uncanoonuc to observe the foliage. Uncanoonuc is located in Goffstown, just north of the northwest corner of Bedford and is actually two mountains, both very rounded. In fact, Uncanoonuc is a Pennacook word that means “woman’s breasts.” Many of the place names in Hillsborough County are, or are derived from, Pennacook words. During the early 18th century when Scottish settlers were claiming land in southern New Hampshire, the Pennacooks were the only Native tribe that were friendly with the Europeans – relations have remained good throughout the centuries.

While driving north along Joppa Hill Road, just before crossing into Goffstown (we could see the twin peaks of Uncanoonuc before us), we saw that there was a yard sale going on at one of the old farm-houses. My wife suggested we stop and take a look for any antiques. I agreed and we went.

It was there that I found a decent copy of the 1903 History. It was in a box with a number of other books. The kind old lady who owned the house sold me the lot for five dollars.

It was the most important five dollars I ever spent.

I was unable to investigate the box of books over the next three days (children have an uncanny ability to ruin the best plans of their parents). When I finally had the time, I was astounded at what I had in my possession.

Apart from the 1903 history, there were five leather bound books measuring roughly 8×5 inches and each about one inch thick. The leather was dried and cracked – it was obvious the books were very old. I made sure to wear surgical gloves while handling them (I keep a box with my tools in the garage – they’re very handy at keeping my hands clean while working on my cars or other smaller engines).

It took some time to get used to the thin, spidery hand in which the books were written. They were a journal or diary of a man named David McClary. From what he wrote, it seems he built the house from which I bought the books in 1778. The first book was nothing more than a ledger of sorts he started in February 1779 in order to track the day to day business of his farm with a few unimportant notes about his family and neighbors.

I assumed that the other four books were much the same and decided to turn the lot over to the Bedford Historical Society (BHS).

Over the next two weeks I enjoyed reading of the exploits of the inhabitants of early Bedford via the 1903 history. It satisfactorily fulfilled my need for knowledge. Recounting all I learned from those pages would take too much time, but I will quote one entry from the Bedford Town Meeting Minutes of 1780 as it pertains to my tale:

March 28, 1780: “To see whether the town will allow the constables for the year 1780 any reward for their extraordinary trouble.” $1,780 was given (odd that it is the same number as the year – also a sizable amount for the time!) though there is no mention at all – anywhere – of what the “extraordinary trouble” was.

Satisfied with the history, I turned to McClary’s journals for reading material before surrendering them to the BHS.

As I said before, the first book (which dates from February 20, 1779 to March 2, 1780) was rather dry reading throughout until the last entry.

It reads: “March 2, 1780 – While at the Town Centre today, in order that I might buy seed, I did meet one Peggy Littlefield, a spinster, so she said, also a mulatto. God forgive me for what I did! A spell she laid, an she must, for next I knew, I was in Riddle’s barn, with no knowledge of getting there, and laying there with her in a carnal way. Lord, forgive this poor soul and Damn Peggy Littlefield and her infant, Hager, as she called him, who did watch us from the shadows.”

mr-burns-one-percent

99% vs 1% – A New Name For An Old American Institution

When Mitt Romney said, “I’m not concerned about the very poor. We have a safety net there. If it needs a repair, I’ll fix it. I’m not concerned about the very rich; they’re doing just fine,” I was outraged. Many other people were outraged too – poor and rich alike. There is quite obviously a gaping tear in the “safety net.”

When the politicians and talking heads began blaming President Obama for starting a “class war,” I was incensed.

“The poor are fine.” “The rich are fine.”  “President Obama is creating an unnecessary class war.”

Yeah, right.

If you’re somebody who likes to focus on the here and now, the Republicans can sound pretty good.

But if you’re like me and like to dig a little deeper behind the words and why they’re being said, have I got a story for you.

Turns out our current “class war” problem has been going on for over three hundred years and it’s steeped in greed and violence.

In 1619, the first 20 slaves shipped to the English colonies of America arrived in Jamestown, Virginia. In the same year, the Virginia House of Burgesses, the first representative assembly in America, was born. This assembly provided the recording and enforcing of contracts between servants and masters. In a few decades, indentured servitude – the practice of agreeing to a term of labor (usually 3 to 7 years) in order to pay for the trip from Europe to the Americas – would be in full swing.

Indentured servants were often beaten and/or raped. In a number of colonies, female servants were not allowed to marry without their master’s permission (typically they weren’t given it). Many of these white European servants fled before their time was up and in a few cases, rose up against their masters.

Indentured servants were sold just like black slaves were.

The idea behind the servitude was that poor Europeans were being driven out of over-crowded cities and given the option to go to the New World and, after serving a time in labor, would be free to make their way and be successful – something they would never get had they stayed in Europe.

The truth is that for the majority only the first generation of servants ever left their servitude and became land owners. Later generations became tenants or general laborers. Land had already been fully parceled out by the aristocrats. Free whites were continually forced west to the frontier to try and make their living in “hostile Indian” country.

In 1676, seventy years after Jamestown was founded and one hundred years before the American colonies declared their independence, Virginia faced it’s first uprising. It is called Bacon’s Rebellion and it stands out because Nathaniel Bacon gathered to him white frontiersman, white servants and black slaves – all eager to follow Bacon to a promise of something better for them. Until recently, Bacon’s Rebellion has been taught as being the first taste of the fight for independence in the colonies, but it was in fact just two very headstrong men – Nathaniel Bacon, a young aristocrat and William Berkeley, the governor of Virginia – who didn’t see eye-to-eye. Bacon was a member of the House of Burgesses and spoke strongly for wiping out the local Indian populations. Berkeley thought it was a bad idea and refused to grant Bacon a military commission. Bacon took it upon himself to gather a militia, fight the Indians and demand a commission. Berkeley again refused, so Bacon led his militia to Jamestown and put it to the torch. This wasn’t a fight for freedom as we have been taught in school, but it did scare Berkeley and other Virginian aristocrats. Why?

Bacon's Rebellion putting the torch to Jamestown.

They saw how easy it was for Bacon to get the masses to rise up in violence.

Berkeley himself wrote in 1676, “How miserable that man is that Governs a People where six parts in seaven [sic] at least are Poore [sic] Endebted Discontented and Armed.”

The wealthy land owners in all of the colonies were mortally afraid of slave uprisings. They were afraid of servants fighting back against their masters. But what they feared most was slaves and poor whites joining forces and creating a rebellion that couldn’t be stopped. Bacon’s Rebellion scared them all. So much so, that the 1,000 English troops Berkeley requested to help stop Bacon and his militia stayed in Virginia. The official request for the troops to stay read:

Virginia is at present poor and more populous than ever. There is great apprehension of a rising among the servants, owing to their great necessities and want of clothes; they may plunder the storehouses and ships.

Seventy years was all it took for European whites to come to a new land and create a gap between the very rich and the very poor so wide that we still have it today, over 300 years later.

At this same time, in the Carolinas, eight men owned 40% of the land. In Maryland, one man ruled the entire colony. In New York, about three-fourths of the land was owned by 30 people.

Carl Bridenbaugh, in his book, Cities in the Wilderness, says:

The leaders of early Boston were gentlemen of considerable wealth who, is association with the clergy, eagerly sought to preserve in America the social arrangements of the Mother Country. By means of their control of trade and commerce, by their political domination of the inhabitants through church and Town Meeting, and  by careful marriage alliances among themselves, members of this little oligarchy laid the foundations for an aristocratic class in seventeenth century Boston.

All of these wealthy white men owned land and only landowners could vote, thereby ensuring their continued control of the colonies.

The 99 and the 1.

By the mid 1700’s, these wealthy men saw the poor as a problem that had to be dealt with – not even realizing that the greed and selfishness of their fathers and grandfathers created the situation.

I think Howard Zinn, in his book, A People’s History of the United States, describes the results of the widening gap between rich and poor best with this:

The New Yorker Cadwallader Colden, in his Address to the Freeholders in 1747, attacked the wealthy as tax dodgers unconcerned with the welfare of others (although he himself was wealthy) and spoke for the honesty and dependability of “the midling rank of mankind” in whom citizens could best trust ‘our liberty & Property.” This was to become a critically important rhetorical device for the rule of the few, who would speak to the many of “our” liberty, “our” property, “our” country.

Any of that sound familiar? Almost sounds like the Romney quote, doesn’t it?

We can’t blame President Obama for starting a “class war.” It’s been here for centuries. And I don’t think we can blame Mitt Romney too much for that quote. It’s how the rich have thought for centuries.

The 99% vs. 1% problem is older than this country. It’s a system that was put into practice immediately after the first European whites landed their ships in North America. It is a system that has been around for centuries and won’t be going away any time soon, if it all.

It’s a shameful foundation of America.